Sgt. Jax Mouse Pad

Guerrilla Memo Gear Drop: Sgt. Jax Mouse Pad
Operational Precision Meets Primal Fury

Finally—an official field-issued surface for those who still operate at the speed of thought (or at least try to). The Sgt. Jax Mouse Pad isn’t just a desk accessory—it’s a tactical statement.

Featuring Sgt. Jax mid-glare, caffeinated and battle-ready, this high-friction polyester slab is optimized for click dominance, LLM interrogation, and high-tempo PowerPoint warfare. Each pad is infused with the faint, unconfirmed scent of Monster Zero, Zyn, and existential dread.

Use Cases:

- Interrogate vendors with enhanced pointer control
- Slide it across the table to assert dominance during staff meetings
- Absorb tears from reading another CONOP titled “AI Integration Pathway”

Issued to real ones only. Get yours.
Sgt. Jax wouldn’t use a trackpad.

Specs:
• Soft polyester surface
• Natural rubber base
• Rounded edges
• 2.8 oz (79.4 g)
• Size: 8.7″ × 7.1″ × 0.12″ (220 × 180 × 3 mm)
• Sourced from China

Attention: Avoid placing the pad under direct sunlight to prevent fading.

Size guide